Do we ever really grow up?

I keep waiting for it. Every year I think to myself "this is the year I will be an adult". I keep waiting for that moment, my epiphany. So far, it hasn't happened. Oh, I know that chronologically I am an adult, hell, I even have very lucid adult-like moments in my head; But they are fleeting. On the inside, I am 15.

I wonder, do we ever really grow up? I mean we are always someone's child. Are there 80-year-old women running around out there feeling the same way as I do? I wish if someone out there is an adult they would tell me what to look for.

I own an adult house, I have an adult job, I make payments on my adult credit cards and I no longer view every weekend as an excuse to 'party down'. Sometimes though, I think that is all because that is what I am supposed to be doing and the inner 15-year-old is silently mocking me.

Fifteen might actually be an exaggeration. I think I actually stopped aging mentally at 22.

So. Do we every really grow up?